A Way

This is one of the biggest evil disrupting our focus frequently. Killing our progress everyday. It awful yet we still unaware of it. Have you experience while setting your aim on certain things, pulling all the effort, and all of the sudden it grabs you- it grabs virtually in your mind, and you wouldn't aware of it and thinking it is most appropriate to do at that time. Every 10 minutes you're on something, every fucking 11 minutes it attacks silently. It disguise as a swan but steal like mice.

I'm On something, and i dislike my attitude of sliding of the track. In fact writing this article would actually make a biological notes in my brain to tell me to be discipline. This procrastination is our own fault.Yes ! you dont have to point your finger, don't blame others. But i tried to find what actually killing the moods when you were highly enthusiast about something.Perhaps the negativity in  our mind to in which to try to find the flaw of the things that we're up to.

I want to Brag right now, yes! brag !, about the  the whole thing that played in my mind right now.Where are the ideas, where are the creativity, i don't know where they have gone, Im doom with this wilting wit like the gloomy days of dark ages.I have surrounded myself with all the equipment called pen and paper. Yet all i could do is to write a few sentence and neglect it completely. How incompetent, I have a drainage of power in which a source will never be renewable. shutting down like plank of a cupboard. Retardation of ideas may lead to suffering of my inner soul and whither to fiery pits of hell.

Hopeless , i have to find a way............

Illusion

Ever wondered to feel high intensity after reading News about something disasterous,or feeling solemn after news of killing or loss of life? or devastating by how the news put the news with it grievance look as if its gonna end of the world?. That  is media manipulation. Even if  its a true story or real incident that happened but media play its role delivering speculation delivering fear. That kind of fear they put in us to dictate our life by pushing us at the sideline to care about the darkness.Throbbing everyone's feeling's of insecurities.More worst if its control by government. Where the freedom of expression and information are blocked in favour of politician.They were the devils chaplain juggling all the input making it seems holy in disguise.

Let alone a person from Kampung who are totally ignorant. Given that  this person never read  news in life or perhaps did heard about rumours in which he or she neglect. Try give this person a few doze of news today and he or she  will willing to be a matyr. With speculation  like cencerous cells , multiplying , infecting  mind, deteriorating functional brain.

For instance - Take share market  ,with a little speculation, see how it goes bull or bear. Some may go tumble or  crumple by false news.  The power of information are far too superior. The economist coined out the term "economics Bubbles" .Ever heard of Turnipmania? It was a period during Dutch Golden age in which contract prices of Bulb of the recently introduced tulip reached extraordinarily high level and then suddenly collapse. Speculation plays with the news making buyer buying for it. And it is said
the price hike up to 10 times the amount paid to skilled craftman.Volatile market.

There is one syndrome that suits this circumstances, its called Mean World Syndrome.

"Mean world syndrome" is a term coined by George Gerbner to describe a phenomenon whereby violence-related content of mass media makes viewers believe that the world is more dangerous than it actually is. Mean world syndrome is one of the main conclusions of cultivation theory. Gerbner, a pioneer researcher on the effects of television on society, argued that people who watched a large amount of television tended to think of the world as an intimidating and unforgiving place.


Alvin Toffler once said- The illiterate of the 21st will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn and relearn.

Perhaps i'm might not be sober writing this.....or am i?

Something to Rant About

There are a few things  i 1found very disturbing .Socializing. I'm not good with it, i do know how it happened, but its already in me. Whenever i got the urge to speak in which i finds it very tolerable to speak at that time, I'd screw'd up. And it always happened as it seem in Bahasa Malayu. I'm just gone awful with it.

More percisely the title should be about communicating. I have no one to blame for my weakness , but would say that , there are things that propagate the declining of my communication skill. There always a loop hole when i try to utter a sentence to which it lead to awkwardness.It Usually happened when i met new person, or met people in large group. Either i would stutter,mis-pronouncing the word, forgettin about what i'm going to tell about, or end up with no talking at all. The aftermath usually will cause me awkward feeling and regret thought which i will lost in my own contemplation.

Why it got in me? i wondered. Bewildered me in curiousity . For much i have seen people socializing with friends and peoples, with much fluently flow through their mouth and every sort of spontaneous effect rhyming flawless. I can't  do like that, seriously it was away much difficult then running 10k. And then it occur to me that i may have some kind of psychological problem.But what is it? 

Am i suffering? certainly not!  or am i a psycopath? obviously no! im perfectly speaking with other person normaly , and i dont have any anti-social personality disorder  of course. But why it dawn to me this way. Does it have todo with confidence? might be!. Lack of confidence may produce such trait that disrupt communication. Have anyone watch live shows or stand-up comedian, I envied those people who can do speech  without agitating or hesitating. 

I have to find a way, to be spontaneous.Could it be that less talking to people, or maybe, i less talk to people..